We are live at the Penn Band Elections, The Balls reporting in. First things first, this is a formal event with all candidates dressed to the 9's trying to impress the voting masses. Also to note several key beards have been shaved prior to the end of elections. Apparently the band has taken a trip to clean town.
First a Quick List of Candidates
President - Matt Gazz(Sax, Junior, Current VP) Vs Evan Hodges Leclaire (Drums, Junior/Silent Partner, Fan Fare VP)
VP - Jake Spector(Sophomore, Trombone) vs Sam Pasternak(Sophomore/Band Camp Alum, Drums)
Treasurer - Jodi Lapidus(Sophomore, Sax, Sax Section Leader) vs Mike "Pips" Can'tspellit (Junior, Drum Section Leader)
Secretary - Angela Halstead(Junior, Recruitment chair) vs Her Red Hair(Also a Junior, Satan).
I will be munching some beef jerky and prepping for the beginning of elections.
6:12
Tensions seem to be running low. Expect that to change soon. There is a pretty legitimate turnout tonight, but alas we are starting late.
6:17
Greer and Stunner take center stage with a Quick Announcement about BBALL. Joe Burns Adam with witty retort. Elections are now officially starting. To much surprise noone has read Greer's emails on how elections work, and thus Stunner explains how elections work. A quick summary:
All Candidates get 2 minutes to give a speech (Pres 4 minutes). After both have given a speech a brief Q&A period follows. After and election is held, the loser may choose to drop down to another position. The elections go in Pres-->VP-->Treasurer-->Secretary. Adam makes terrible Joke. People laugh at Joe.
6:20
Presidential election time: Stunner explains the Job
President: Runs the board, ensures the smooth operation of the Band. Attend SMAC/SAC/PAC meetings. Deal with general Band Issues.
(Gordon Garner's Applause for something I can't see)
Matt Gazz:
- Points out he is the current VP
- Supports Democracy
- Talks about the fact that he is tacky enough to wear 2 lapel pins
- These show
- He is not a terrorist (America Pin)
- He is a dedicated to Band (Fanfare member)
Matt points out his past leadership positions in the band as reasons he is fit to be Pres
- Sax Section Leader
- VP
- Being on board for a year prepares you for what it is to be President. The four board positions need to work together to maintain a coherent and strong band and being the only possible incumbent member Gazz could more readily foster this.
Possibly actually organize a realistic trip for the end of the year. Organize a new CD which still hasn't been made. Wants to give back to the Band by Being Pres
6:26
EHL: Band is about much more than music. Incredible social outlet as well as a relief from the everyday scholastic stress of school. Decided to become Vice Chair of fanfare at end of Sophomore year. Evan highlights the jobs of fanfare. Highlights the fact that fanfare is actually a legitimate organization that has accountability and fiscal responsibility. In HS EHL was lead officer of his Band. Believes that this is a good preparation for our Band. In his Vice Chair role of fanfare he points out that he is very proactive in his role, that he does need to be asked and takes initiative. Also he has consistently put forth ideas in order to help the band. He wants to be President for the People, to contribute to the Band as one of the people.
Questions:
Stunner: What is the Most Imp Attribute for a Successful Band
EHL: President is the figure head of the band. Need a proactive person to eliminate uncertainty.
Gazz: President needs to be a person of the people. Micromanagement through the council is what can keep people in this band.
Jaci: Can you tell us about a time where there was an issue that you needed to deal with quickly as a leader in band.
Gazz: There are times when parts of the shows got cut right before we needed to practice it. Needed to come up with material on his feet in order to get the show done.
Evan: Fanfare has inductions every semester. FF missed a possible candidate this semester and Evan did everything he could to smoothly initiate that person.
Justine: How to Balance Social Aspects of the Band with Organizing
EHL: Capable of interacting with everyone and organizing what needs to get done. Can see this through is DJing
Gazz: Has been "Living The Dream" as he feels he currently encompasses both of these issues.
Jake: If you weren't elected would you run for something else
Gazz: Would drop to VP as he needs somehting to take up his inbox!
EHL: Yes he would drop down to sec. He has thought about being on board for a long time and decided Pres is the best way to lead this band.
Me: Can you handle the fact that you will potentially have your GF/Best friends on this board with you
EHL: Yes. He believes it's critical to the position of being on Board and comes down to the core of why he is running.
Gazz: Board is very evenly distributed this year and that has prepared him for what would be to come regardless of who is on board. He knows what needs to be done and would do the job.
Jake Spect: What would you do differently as President
Gass: Immediately be able to pick up at the beginning of his term. Need to work closely with the council in order to motivate people to attend events. Work as close with council as possible.
EHL: There is a sense of uncertainty about what we are doing as a band. Would stay on top of what there is to do and be prepared.
Ellen: Have you ever had to deal with an ENEMY!?
EHL: Times in the drum line when they had to work together between clashing members where things would become uncomfortable. Need to be level headed. EHL essentially invalidates my entire approach to life! He is good at seeing both sides and can mediate the situation.
Gazz: Independent of your previous friendships, once on board you get to know everyone closely. In example, the band knows the story of DPS. The situation was handled quickly and a decision was made.
Nia: Do you have a smart phone?
BOTH:: Yes
Nia: Can you be ready for your phone to blow up?
Gazz: Greer and Adam eventually stop sending email. Koosh sends emails at 6:00AM because... Gazz knows what it takes to respond to emails.
Evan: Extremely fast email responder. He believes turn around time is important!
Gordon: What changes have you implemented this year
EHL: -BLOG EDIT, SRY :- (
Gazz: Weekly email as Sax Section Leader: Helps keep coming. As VP the former VP was silent on issues. Gazz decided to be a much more proactive VP
Closing Statements
EHL: "I definitely do love this Band" It's his only activity. He is confident in his ability to lead and is honored to be President.
Gazz: Enjoys band, and we are his "Good Friends" Wants to give back to the organization and wants to continue the momentum. Gazz then pulls the band's constitution from his lapel pocket.
Voting commences on Polk's Hair...
6:57
Greer entertains the masses with magic tricks. Greer makes Racist Joke about cards. HE DOES NOT DISAPPOINT!!!! Magically he divines a card Ellen chose.
7:02
Koosh is now trying to sell band apparel to people as hannukah presents. If you are an ALUMNI, BUY OUR STUFF AND GIVE US MONEY!. Koosh then shamelessly plugs his own book so that his children can eat more than just curry. People accuse the balls of being racist.
7:04:45
The President of the Penn Band for the Year of 2011 is Mathew Gazzara
VP Election Time!
Newly elected President Mathew Gazzara describes the position of VP.
Jake Spector: Points out that he is webmaster of Penn Band. Then quotes Muhammed Ali and says the penn band halftime shows will have wings! Wants to draw people out to showwriting in order to incorporate everyones ideas at showwriting. If show writing is just in the fall what will he do in the Spring!? Help with recruitment and retention and help plan the next band trip. As webmaster has revolutionized the section webpages as well as the new "Join the Penn Band" page. Ends with a line from Journey
Sam Pasternak: He does two things on the campus is Penn Band and is managing editor of the Punch Bowl. Essentially points out that he just writes comedy on the campus. More important than comedy writing is working with other people. His door will always be open for new and interesting ideas. Show writing, like BFL will send PPL to the Hospital. He has recently begun arranging music again and believes that being able to arrange will really help the role of VP. Ends with a line from Double Rainbow.
Questions:
Koosh: What is your favorite show?
Sam: Cornell. The show was indefensible by Cornell, thought it was very funny/ was a blast to write.
Jake: Senior show, the show looked really good.
Jake: Tell us a joke
Jake S: Anyone who knows me, knows I can't tell a joke?
Sam: Sam tells a joke about shooting people?
Dillon: How would you improve show writing?
Sam: Would have an hour to draft a show. For the first 20 or so minutes nothing got done. Thus when we got to the show we didn't have much time in person. Go to dinner to get ideas out of the way and then write the show hcore int he band room.
Jake: Similar sentiment.
Jaci: Name three new people who come to show writing?
Jake: Me, Joe Becker
Sam: same, + DKJ
Pips: How to make sure shows aren't censored?
Sam: Having done comedy before he is known as the clean one. Is used to lightening up Masturbation jokes. Need to appeal to audience without being gross.
Jake: Ideas that are on the fence need to be backed up just in case.
Camille: How can you tell people they aren't funny?
Sam: Ask Josh Cooper. Some other stuff, but that was funny.
Jake: Usually everyone is funnier than him so he'd go about it nicely. Wants to make it a fun atmosphere.
Stunner: VP is a weird job as you have a lot of work in the fall, but have free reign in the spring, what are you well suited for?
Jake: Webmaster and big part of recruiting. Believes he can be apar tof recruiting again and help new webmaster get acclimated.
Sam: Started Cheerleader vs Penn Band game in the spring. Been talking about the CD and has ideas for the CD and format. Believes it would be a ton of fun.
Closing Statements
Sam: Really wants the job. Has a relationship with koosh and adam and he respects Greer... for some reason.
Jake: Loves Everything.
Voting on Richard Nixon's Hair
7:26
Will Chim and Camille join Greer on stage. A chorus of "Will Chim's" Dad commences. This Trick is confusing. Will Chim tries to Ruin it all showing everyone he is the Real David Sawyers. This Trick is incredibly confusing... Noone understands what's going on. Greer attempts to pawn off counting as magic...
7:32.50
Sam is the New Vice President
7:33
Gordon describes the roll of treasurer. You need to write budgets, manage accounts, contribute to board discussions and attend meetings.
7:34 Jodi Lapidus
Starts speech with a long quote from Shaq about being awesome. Jodi wants to spend money on what the band needs. The first thing is increasing repitoire (i can't spell this) by buying new music. Wants to organize frequent fundraisers so the band can actually go on a trip. Reasons she is qualified: She is jewish; she is the Sax section leader and has increased size of section 5 fold; extremely organized and would do a great job.
Pips
Penn bando first and foremost. He is a math major and accounting minor. Has experience with microsoft excel, and is skilled in the tools. Wants to be a good board member and that involves being an active and enthusiastic member. Band > School which means that he can always put band first. Has been a section leader for two years, largest section in the band, and there is a reason for that.
Questions
Tom: Gordon is a wizard. How would you become the band treasurey wizard?
Pips: Talk to Gordon and acquaint himself with the task at hand.
Jodi: Similar
Jake: Sac Funding XP?
Both: NO
Ellen: How can you work with the people currently on board as of tonight?
Pips: Working relationship with both people on board as well as friendship with pips. Math background can round that out.
Jodi: Similar to pips but gazz instead of Sam, she brings decisiveness to the board.
Justine: Will you be available to do the little things
Both: Point out their section leader prowess which honestly they are damn good at (My Opinion).
Jaci: What is your favorite currency excluding the dollar:
Pips: Yen because you can alot of them for cheap
Jodi: Something about the deutch mark that I missed (sorry).
Koosh: Make a pitch for something that we need right now:
Jodi: We need new drums. Currently the bass drum harness is broken and is a hazard. If that breaks, someone could get hurt and we need new things to keep us safe.
Pips: Arranging software for the band in order to add a personal touch to the band.
Gordon: What are the biggest expenses in the band?
Pips: Transport
Jodi: Instruments.
Godron: How do you think finances work?
This is boring... You can email Greer about it... My fingers are tired.
Closing Statements
Pips: Math Finance info/Loves Band
Jodi: Love to do the job for everyone.
Voting on Marten Van Buren's Hair
7:52 Greer starts a new magic trick. I think he just made fun of my Penis... I'm not sure.
He is now naming his fingers like the old, crazy man he is. Tonights theme is really the middle finger. Greer has now given the band the finger twice and Adam once. I am excited.
7:56 I AM SO HUNGRY JESUS CHRIST I NEED SOME FOOD. IF YOU ARE OUT THERE<>
7:58
The new Treasurer is Mike "Pips" Guarino
7:59 Secretary
Evan is nominated for secretary. He accepts. Jaci describes what the secretary does.
Angela: Angela plays the Piccolo. She believes she is the best candidate for the position. She has nearly perfect attendance and is a member of Fanfare. As a freshman she was recruitment chair, and has been recruitment chair for the last two years. Under Angela the Penn band has tripled in size since her freshmen year. She works over the summer to increase recruitment. Believes recruitment chair has prepared her to be secretary as she has to keep excel sheets of all incoming members.
Evan: No Speech
Questions:
- First question is inane
Nia: What would you do differently?
Evan: Improve schedule email efficiency.
Angela: Agrees. Getting good standing list out earlier so people know where they are standing and what they need to do. In addition continue to get to know everyone
Gazz: Angela what have you done differently than previous RC
Angela: During my time as recruitment chair i've sent personalized emails and tried to keep up with sheets on individuals.
Evan: Secretary is responsible for retention. you have to get to know them all. Good at talking to people into the band.
Joe: What unsung things have you done in the band as secretary is the unsung board position
Evan: Taken a role in organizing the drum section with instrumentation.
Angela: Individually compiled all the gift bags for freshman, gone to every show writing and helped with tons of set up and band helping out. Sends hundreds of individual emails.
Sam: Something I didn't hear but I'm pretty sure it's just my question from earlier... It is.
Angela: Matt and She can put aside their relationship to get stuff done. They work in the same lab and know how to jobs complete.
Evan: Pips and evan get along great... sam is a good friend of his... Gazz and he work together well.
They point to people and name them... They both go 3/3 (if only they shot free throws for the basketball team)
Closing Statements
Evan: Everything earlier applies. The Board is highly cooperative and he would love to work with the 3 other peeople. Secretary helps retention and recruitment which he holds important.
Angela: Secretary is her number 1 choice and wants to help the band in what she thinks she can do best. By being recruitment chair for 2 years she is prepared to be secretary.
Voting on Chester Allen Arthur's Hair
8:10 Horses Ass Award: Greer describes the Horses Ass Award which you all know! He opens the floor for nominations:
Pips - Losing the Key to FF
Adu - For running a midnight marathon right to the hospital
Greer Makes Fun of Catholicism... Jesus Is Coming for Him
Voting commences on Bill Clinton's Hair
Angela is The New Secretary
Thanks for reading everyone
