A Night to Remember (an alum's perspective)

As one of two alumni who attended the Peter & Carolyn Lynch anniversary event, I present a similar (but different) perspective on the evening...

4:00pm: Steve Walsh (the other alumnus who attended) and I arrive at the Westin Hotel. We ran into some bandos in the parking lot who told us the party was for Peter & Carolyn Lynch. It was then we realized that we were among the minority of people who knew who he was. Suffice to say, the man knows how to invest money. Sadly, we played the entire event without getting a single stock tip.

4:05pm: Since we were early, we went to Greer's hotel room, where Greer was sorting music, and Angie was raving to us about the decorations at the ICA (they had been there for rehearsal).

4:30pm: Meet the band in the lobby. Erik and A-Tone have agreed to exchange pants (not as good a story as it sounds). Sondra is late, but proves to be able to change clothes faster than anyone I've ever seen. Ben Gaines proves that "blue sweater" does not mean "same color sweater as everyone else."

~5:00pm: Arrive at the ICA. Lesson learned: event planners are never in a good mood. Also, after a conference, they've decided that they're not comfortable with the message that "Just a Gigolo" sends, even after Greer reminds them that we don't sing. Koosh suggests "Touch Me." That also goes nowhere. (Side note: we were asked to do several things that we just don't do, like wear costumes, play "swanky" music like Mack the Knife, etc., and sing. But more on that later). Anyway, Greer & Koosh go inside to work out the playlist (eventual decision: Carry On, My Wayward Son). Greer lives Angie in charge. She supervises us as we stand around by the bus & wait for Greer & Koosh to return. She's a natural...

5:30pm: We are ushered to our "Green Room." The event planner orders someone to bring us water, soda, and chips. The water is sparkling and Norwegian (don't ask). She also goes in search of a copy machine, so everyone has music to Carry On, since some didn't bring anything other than the (ahem...) previously agreed upon music. The band pretends to tune. Then, it's time to perform.

6:00pm: We are ushered onto a terrace over-looking the water. There is a stage, but we asked to stay among the crowd, with Greer on the stage. There is a jazz trio playing "swanky" music, and another event planner (slightly less upset than the previous one) tries to rehearse "Surprise!" with the crowd. I wouldn't say they were weak - let's just say the band helped save that particular part of the party. While waiting for Peter & Carolyn to arrive, we learned a few things. First, they were married on the Penn Campus. I asked if the Band was at the wedding, but one of his guests reminded me that he wasn't famous at the time - in fact, he was broke! Others seemed thrilled that we came all the way from Philadelphia for the party.

6:30pm: Peter and Carolyn arrive. They were told the party was for a Harvard professor celebrating his 5th anniversary for something-or-other (as an indication of how much money was spent on this party, the ICA had signs on display at the front of the building for the fake event, so the couple wouldn't suspect). Peter & Carolyn walk in & the band yells, "Surprise!" The crowd half-heartedly does the same. We play "Fight On" and "Highball" from within the crowd. Some of the older guests jump into the harbor because of how loud we are (just kidding). The event planner says to Greer, "have the band sing 'Happy Anniversary.'" Greer temporarily loses his mind, turns to us and asks us to sing. Our stunned reaction snaps him back into reality, and we graciously decline the request.

6:35: Mr. Lynch comes over to us and says, "University of Pennsylvania Band! Wonderful, wonderful..." or something like that. I think the surprise worked. After greeting the band, he greeted his family (?!?). His grandkids seemed a little concerned that the band may play again, but eventually came over & gave grandpa a hug.

6:40: The event planner gets on the microphone and says, "everyone gather around the marching band for a group picture." We try to make ourselves small, as wealthy guests in impossibly expensive clothing & jewelry fill in around us. The photographer asks us to move closer to her as a group. I assure one of the guests that as a marching band, moving around as a group is something we do all the time. She seems relieved...

6:45: Picture taken (hopefully, we get a copy), and we make a graceful exit so the guests can enjoy their cocktail hour. We go back into the green room, where some waiter brings us still more soda, water and chips. We use my blackberry to get on Google and answer the following questions: 1) Peter Lynch went to Wharton grad, not undergrad; 2) He's worth about $350M; 3) He's not the Lynch from Merrill Lynch; 4) The Lynch from Merrill Lynch is Edmund C. Lynch, who died in the 1930's; 5) We don't know much about Carolyn, because all the Google responses about her are actually about him, or about the building(s) at Penn named after her.

~7:15: We go back out to the terrace, and rudely interrupt the jazz trio with "Final Countdown," in a not-so-subtle attempt to tell the guests to leave the cocktail hour and proceed to the dinner. When we finish, the drums line up outside the dining room to cadence, and the rest of the band moves into the dining room, where the real band (guitar, trumpet, sax, trombone) prepare to jam with us on "Carry On..."

~7:30: The event planner (the more upset of the two) comes in and says, "I'd start playing the song if I were you." Koosh points out to her that perhaps *SHE* would start playing the song, but *WE* don't have our director (Greer was still outside) or our drummers (who are cadencing the guests into the dining room). Perplexed by the logic in Koosh's retort, she disappears, and reappears with Greer, who kicks off Carry On (drums? we don't need no stinkin' drums!). The house band *KICKS ASS* behind us, especially the guitar player - who seems to be playing the actual Kansas part, and really fills in the song. (Note to Noah: recruit an electric guitar section for next year). The effect works, as the room is filled with music when Peter & Carolyn enter. He smiles & waves graciously and tells us all to buy Google stock (again, kidding...). The drums arrive just as we finish, and then we all proceed out the side door, through a hallway, and out onto the loading dock, where we re-board the bus.

~7:45: One would think this would be the end of the story, but alas, more shenanigans await. Someone on the bus calls the event the "strangest thing he's ever done with the band," to which Steve replies, "didn't you guys play a funeral earlier this year?" Anyway, the bus proceeds to leave the parking lot and then BLAMMO!!! The horizontal support on a street light banner had apparently been dragging along the side of the bus, and eventually built up enough pressure to "pop" the safety glass. There is a small explosion as what was once glass instantly becomes dust, followed by a couple of screams (flutes...), followed by several cell phone cameras snapping pictures, followed by someone yelling "has Koosh posted this to Oxy yet?" and someone else yelling, "Blog! Blog! Blog!"

~7:50: Out of respect for the (rather shaken up driver), I waited until we got back to the hotel to take my pictures. By the time I had taken three pictures, Sondra had already changed back to street clothes. Amazing...