A Night to Remember (an alum's perspective)

As one of two alumni who attended the Peter & Carolyn Lynch anniversary event, I present a similar (but different) perspective on the evening...

4:00pm: Steve Walsh (the other alumnus who attended) and I arrive at the Westin Hotel. We ran into some bandos in the parking lot who told us the party was for Peter & Carolyn Lynch. It was then we realized that we were among the minority of people who knew who he was. Suffice to say, the man knows how to invest money. Sadly, we played the entire event without getting a single stock tip.

4:05pm: Since we were early, we went to Greer's hotel room, where Greer was sorting music, and Angie was raving to us about the decorations at the ICA (they had been there for rehearsal).

4:30pm: Meet the band in the lobby. Erik and A-Tone have agreed to exchange pants (not as good a story as it sounds). Sondra is late, but proves to be able to change clothes faster than anyone I've ever seen. Ben Gaines proves that "blue sweater" does not mean "same color sweater as everyone else."

~5:00pm: Arrive at the ICA. Lesson learned: event planners are never in a good mood. Also, after a conference, they've decided that they're not comfortable with the message that "Just a Gigolo" sends, even after Greer reminds them that we don't sing. Koosh suggests "Touch Me." That also goes nowhere. (Side note: we were asked to do several things that we just don't do, like wear costumes, play "swanky" music like Mack the Knife, etc., and sing. But more on that later). Anyway, Greer & Koosh go inside to work out the playlist (eventual decision: Carry On, My Wayward Son). Greer lives Angie in charge. She supervises us as we stand around by the bus & wait for Greer & Koosh to return. She's a natural...

5:30pm: We are ushered to our "Green Room." The event planner orders someone to bring us water, soda, and chips. The water is sparkling and Norwegian (don't ask). She also goes in search of a copy machine, so everyone has music to Carry On, since some didn't bring anything other than the (ahem...) previously agreed upon music. The band pretends to tune. Then, it's time to perform.

6:00pm: We are ushered onto a terrace over-looking the water. There is a stage, but we asked to stay among the crowd, with Greer on the stage. There is a jazz trio playing "swanky" music, and another event planner (slightly less upset than the previous one) tries to rehearse "Surprise!" with the crowd. I wouldn't say they were weak - let's just say the band helped save that particular part of the party. While waiting for Peter & Carolyn to arrive, we learned a few things. First, they were married on the Penn Campus. I asked if the Band was at the wedding, but one of his guests reminded me that he wasn't famous at the time - in fact, he was broke! Others seemed thrilled that we came all the way from Philadelphia for the party.

6:30pm: Peter and Carolyn arrive. They were told the party was for a Harvard professor celebrating his 5th anniversary for something-or-other (as an indication of how much money was spent on this party, the ICA had signs on display at the front of the building for the fake event, so the couple wouldn't suspect). Peter & Carolyn walk in & the band yells, "Surprise!" The crowd half-heartedly does the same. We play "Fight On" and "Highball" from within the crowd. Some of the older guests jump into the harbor because of how loud we are (just kidding). The event planner says to Greer, "have the band sing 'Happy Anniversary.'" Greer temporarily loses his mind, turns to us and asks us to sing. Our stunned reaction snaps him back into reality, and we graciously decline the request.

6:35: Mr. Lynch comes over to us and says, "University of Pennsylvania Band! Wonderful, wonderful..." or something like that. I think the surprise worked. After greeting the band, he greeted his family (?!?). His grandkids seemed a little concerned that the band may play again, but eventually came over & gave grandpa a hug.

6:40: The event planner gets on the microphone and says, "everyone gather around the marching band for a group picture." We try to make ourselves small, as wealthy guests in impossibly expensive clothing & jewelry fill in around us. The photographer asks us to move closer to her as a group. I assure one of the guests that as a marching band, moving around as a group is something we do all the time. She seems relieved...

6:45: Picture taken (hopefully, we get a copy), and we make a graceful exit so the guests can enjoy their cocktail hour. We go back into the green room, where some waiter brings us still more soda, water and chips. We use my blackberry to get on Google and answer the following questions: 1) Peter Lynch went to Wharton grad, not undergrad; 2) He's worth about $350M; 3) He's not the Lynch from Merrill Lynch; 4) The Lynch from Merrill Lynch is Edmund C. Lynch, who died in the 1930's; 5) We don't know much about Carolyn, because all the Google responses about her are actually about him, or about the building(s) at Penn named after her.

~7:15: We go back out to the terrace, and rudely interrupt the jazz trio with "Final Countdown," in a not-so-subtle attempt to tell the guests to leave the cocktail hour and proceed to the dinner. When we finish, the drums line up outside the dining room to cadence, and the rest of the band moves into the dining room, where the real band (guitar, trumpet, sax, trombone) prepare to jam with us on "Carry On..."

~7:30: The event planner (the more upset of the two) comes in and says, "I'd start playing the song if I were you." Koosh points out to her that perhaps *SHE* would start playing the song, but *WE* don't have our director (Greer was still outside) or our drummers (who are cadencing the guests into the dining room). Perplexed by the logic in Koosh's retort, she disappears, and reappears with Greer, who kicks off Carry On (drums? we don't need no stinkin' drums!). The house band *KICKS ASS* behind us, especially the guitar player - who seems to be playing the actual Kansas part, and really fills in the song. (Note to Noah: recruit an electric guitar section for next year). The effect works, as the room is filled with music when Peter & Carolyn enter. He smiles & waves graciously and tells us all to buy Google stock (again, kidding...). The drums arrive just as we finish, and then we all proceed out the side door, through a hallway, and out onto the loading dock, where we re-board the bus.

~7:45: One would think this would be the end of the story, but alas, more shenanigans await. Someone on the bus calls the event the "strangest thing he's ever done with the band," to which Steve replies, "didn't you guys play a funeral earlier this year?" Anyway, the bus proceeds to leave the parking lot and then BLAMMO!!! The horizontal support on a street light banner had apparently been dragging along the side of the bus, and eventually built up enough pressure to "pop" the safety glass. There is a small explosion as what was once glass instantly becomes dust, followed by a couple of screams (flutes...), followed by several cell phone cameras snapping pictures, followed by someone yelling "has Koosh posted this to Oxy yet?" and someone else yelling, "Blog! Blog! Blog!"

~7:50: Out of respect for the (rather shaken up driver), I waited until we got back to the hotel to take my pictures. By the time I had taken three pictures, Sondra had already changed back to street clothes. Amazing...

A Night to Remember

So this past weekend the Penn Band was in Boston to play at a surprise party for Peter and Carolyn Lynch's 40th wedding anniversary. This black tie affair was not our typical venue, so I thought it might be worth keeping track of what happened. Little did I know how true this would be. The following is an unaltered account of 4:30-7:30 pm, August 9, 2008.

4:30- Call for meeting in the hotel lobby.
4:45- Everyone arrives in the hotel lobby. A few bandos are not wearing pants.
4:50- It's ok, their pants were on the bus, and people finished changing on the way to the ICA.
5:00- Arrived at the ICA (Institute of Contemporary Art), where the event was to be held. We take out our instruments.
5:10- We find out that they do not want us to play "Just a Gigolo," the song we had rehearsed earlier that day to play with the Sultans of Swing, and told everyone to bring.
5:15- Greer and Koosh go to talk with the Sultans, to figure out what other songs we have that they can play with us. Meanwhile the rest of us start to go into the building. However, we are stopped at the door. Apparently we can't go in the main entrance, and we need to go around the side and use the service door.
5:20- Once inside our "holding area" for the evening, stocked with potato chips and Norwegian water, Greer and Koosh return to say we are going to try Carry On. A couple of us go upstairs to play a little of our version for the Sultans. The guy looks at the music, says "Yeah, sure, we can handle it.", and takes the trombone part. ...In traditional Penn Band style, we're gonna wing it...
5:25- Pretty much every instrument has at least one part for Carry On, and the ICA has a copy machine, so we collect the music to make copies.
5:30- We get back the copies. Someone enters our holding room, looks around at us in surprise, asks "Everything ok?", and walks out before we can respond.
5:35- We are told that we'll be going outside in 5-10 minutes.
5:40- We have a lengthy discussion on the actual worth of Peter Lynch. The guesses ranged from "100 million dollars" to "a few billion" to "more money than all of us and all of our families, combined."
5:45- Someone suggests that the company Merril Lynch was actually formed by Koosh's wife and Peter Lynch, 150 years ago.
6:00- We actually go outside (25 minutes from warning). This is a VERY swanky party. Oysters, lox pizza with caviar, and other delights are circulating among the guests. We got chips.
6:05- The guests practice yelling surprise (first time)
6:07- The guests practice yelling surpise (second time)
6:09- We practice playing immediately after the guests practice yelling surpise (third time)
6:15- The guests yell surprise, for real this time. The guests of honor have arrived, and we greet them with that party hit, Fight On Pennsylvania! This is followed by Highball.
6:25- Audible! They want us to sing "Happy Anniversary." Just as we're about to start they apparently realize that we are in fact a band, not an a capella group, and call it off.
6:30- Now smile! It's picture time, and the party-goers are told "Everyone gather around the marching band."
6:35- We are shepherded back inside, and told it will be about half an hour more until "round 2".
6:45- 3 minute warning.
6:48- Heading outside again. I hear from behind me "Angie, put this in your pocketbook please," and see Greer handing over a rubber duck. She responds, "This is why I bring the big bag," and takes it.
6:50- The party planners tell us to start, even though there is already a jazz band outside, in the midst of playing. Needless to say, they looked up in shock (along with all the guests), as we began to play The Final Countdown. It sort of destroyed the atmosphere, but that's how we roll.
7:00- The drummers begin to cadence, and we lead the way into the dining room for dinner/the rest of the party. Unfortunately, it seemed no one told the guests that they were supposed to follow us, so the drummers were just outside cadencing for a while.
7:05- As the first people come in, we are told to start playing Carry On. However, there are a number of issues that needed to be dealt with. 1) The drums are still outside cadencing. 2) Greer is outside with the percussion. 3) The Sultans of Swing only had the trombone part.
7:07- After they bring Greer inside, and I give my chop part to their trumpet player, it seems 2/3 is good enough. With only a drum set (ad-libbing) as percussion, we play Carry On. All things considered, it didn't sound half bad.
7:10- They tell us its time to go. No wait, not yet. Yeah, we were just kidding, go now! We go out through our side door, and make our way back to the bus.
7:15- Instruments away, we get on the bus, and start to pull out of the parking lot. However, we didn't go far. In the lot, there was a large sign for "Harborside," one of those banners that is held up by horizontal poles on top and on the bottom. The bottom pole was slightly lower than it appeared to the driver, and it scrapes against two windows of the bus. It then spiderweb cracks a third, and we hear a loud noise as the pole comes through the fourth. The window (and the one behind it) shattered, and broken glass went into the bus. Luckily, no one was sitting there, so no one was hurt. The driver pulls away from the pole (creating a gash in the side of the bus), and then stops. The cracked window looks ready to pop out of the frame.
7:25- After making a phone call, the driver takes us back to the hotel. We arrive without further incident.

All in all, it was an interesting 3 hours....

The Ever-Changing Penn Band

This past weekend, my family and I had the privilege of spending yet another fun-filled day with the Penn Band on the occasion of the 2008 Alumni Day festivities. After serenading alumni of all ages and leading the traditional parade of classes, band members returned to their various, non-musical lives, while I and two of my fellow alumni went to the Glee Club Graduate Club reception.

Before I go any further, a quick word about the Penn Glee Club. The Penn Glee Club is a truly amazing organization. At 145 years old, they are Penn's oldest performing arts group. They have performed in nearly all 50 states, and in 35 nations on five continents. They've appeared on national television, at professional sporting events, and in the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. They've also sung in the presence of various world leaders, and celebrities such as Bob Hope, Frank Sinatra, Jimmy Stewart, Grace Kelly and Bill Cosby. In 1991, I had the pleasure of performing in their pit orchestra, which is what led to my presence at their graduate club reception last Saturday.

As a member of the pit orchestra, and a good friend of several club members, I've heard the club perform numerous times. I was always dutifully impressed with their rich, full sound and their polished, professional showmanship. They were always one of the few groups on campus that could easily hold their own alongside professional singing groups of any stripe. When the club regaled us with song at the GCGC reception, though, I had an interesting realization. The 2008 Glee Club sounded exactly like the 1991 Glee Club, singing various Penn Songs as well as some Club standards that the alumni knew well.

I commented to one of my friends that in a weird way, this made the Glee Club a little less impressive to me, since the achievements of the '91 Club seem to have been replicated precisely by an entirely new group of students, 17 years later. Not to take anything away from the current Club, mind you, but as impressive as they sound, it's likely that the 2025 Glee Club will sound equally as impressive 17 years from now.

I bring all of this up here on the Penn Band's blog to emphasize something unique about the Penn Band. Excellent musicians that they are, the 2008 Penn Band sounds very different from the Penn Band I knew back in 1991. The standard Penn Songs have all seen transformations (the trombone lick they added to The Red and Blue is brand new, but fits so nicely it sounds like it's been there since 1898, for example). Other staples, like Joshua and Mary Anne have disappeared altogether, replaced with new standards like The Final Countdown. And All Right Now, while technically still the same song, has undergone so many changes as to be almost unrecognizable to alums who haven't heard it in a while.

Tradition is a big part of what makes Penn special. If you prefer your tradition straight up, with every word, note and phrase exactly as you remember it, I couldn't recommend better than the Penn Glee Club. But if you prefer your tradition shaken, stirred, smashed into a million pieces, and then put back together in a way that is comfortably familiar yet distinctly new, fresh and modern, then the next time you're on campus, you've got to seek out the Penn Band.

Thanks for an awesome time, folks - see you at Homecoming!

The Penn Band wins a Women's Lacrosse game

For those of you that don't know, in addition to playing euphonium in the band, I also cover Penn sports teams for the Daily Pennsylvanian, Penn's student newspaper. I've yet to cover either football or men's basketball, as these sports are normally reserved for juniors and seniors to cover. However, the biggest sport that I've covered over my two years has been the women's lacrosse team.

Now, once the men's basketball season comes to a close, the Penn Band normally goes into hibernation mode. Well not quite. We do a few scattered spring events here and there. And so far this year we've done two women's lacrosse games. Now, I've had to cover both of these games for the DP, so I haven't played with the band. Doing so would constitute a direct conflict of interest, since I'd be rooting for a team (by playing an instrument) and then covering said team for an objective media source.

However, a much iffier issue of conflict of interest occurred after the most recent Penn Band-attended women's lacrosse game. Yesterday, the No. 5 Quakers faced No. 1 Northwestern who was undefeated and on a 36-game winning streak. The Wildcats also had won the last three national championships. It was a huge game, so the band decided to come out and support the team.

Well the Quakers pulled off the stunning upset. (Here are my live game updates of the match; notice the Penn Band references). Anyway, after the game I was waiting to interview some players/coaches. Penn senior captain Rachel Manson, whom I've interviewed several times before and knows me by sight, turns to me completely out of the blue and says, "Because the Penn Band came." Since it seemed sort of off the record I asked her to state it for the record. So she repeated herself, "Because the Penn Band came we won today." I was sort of in shock she said that, but what a quote.
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Now here's where the conflict of interest comes into play. To give some background, the last time the Penn Band came to a women's lacrosse game was the Wednesday April 2 game against Johns Hopkins. I wrote the preview for that game, and I interviewed Manson for it. Being the idiot that I was, I told her that the Penn Band was coming and then asked her what her thoughts were. She was pretty impressed and said she remembered the band coming the previous year for the Princeton game in which the Quakers clinched the Ivy title and how it made that game really special. After the interview I told her I was in the band and that I'd probably play with them (eventually I didn't since no one else could cover the game for the DP).

I wanted to run her quotes about the Band, but my editors wouldn't let me since they said it was a conflict of interest since I had brought it up myself, and she responded to my theoretically biased question. Now I didn't really argue that too much, and retrospectively it makes sense.

Flash forward to yesterday. Before I even wrote my story I went up to my editor and explained the situation with Manson's most recent pro-Penn Band quote. However, he disallowed it yet again, saying even though she was completely unprompted to mention the band, she still knew that I was in the band and that potentially skewered her quote.

I didn't quite understand this logic since the previous time he had told me it couldn't run because I had brought up the band on my own. But then again, he has the final say, so I declined to write it in.

I also wrote an email on the band's list serve asking the journalists of the band whether they thought there was a conflict of interest. A band alum who works at a national media outlet yet wanted anonymity agreed with my editor that this might appear to be a conflict of interest since I am a member of the band. So if a professional journalist agrees, that's enough for me.

But even if it didn't make it to print, it's still true that at least one women's lacrosse player thinks we're the reason they earned potentially the biggest win in program history.

But it gets even better. At the time Manson said it, I thought maybe she was joking, or just reacting instinctively, something temporal. But last night after I sent her a facebook comment congratulating her on the win, she responded by reiterating her comment about the band: "I'm telling you on the record it is all because of the Penn Band," she wrote.

Moral of the story: The Band, despite all the s*** it can get sometimes from various sources, is still appreciated by athletes. And that's what matters in the end.

NB: Thanks to Brian for catching the mistakes up to the --- line. But I'm sure there's still some out there! Who wants more nickels!

Penn Band meets the workplace

What a game it was last night! Two milestones were achieved:

1. It was the first time in over a decade (not since 1997) that the national championship game of the men's NCAA tournament had gone into overtime (very exciting!), and

2. It was the first time since I've been filling out these silly brackets (c. 2002) that I a) shelled out money to participate AND b) won (half the pool)

I went back and read the fine print, and it revealed that I was entitled to half of the winnings! I'd steadily held first place since the beginning of the tournament, but my UCLA/UNC fantasy bumped me down to (a still respectable) 5th place finish in the graduated points system that many brackets utilize. However, I was still head and shoulders above anyone else in terms of total number of games chosen correctly (47-- how does this number compare to other pools? For perspective, there were only 35-40 people in mine).

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And now...it's the first installment of a semi-regular series! "Penn Band and the Workplace," or something not quite as lame. Basically, I plan to mention the instances when something I learned as a bando has shockingly paid off in The Real World.

Photo: Wired.com (no individual photographer attribution), 2007.

Although this year's Quakers squad wasn't able to win the league's automatic bid and send 29 of us (plus Greer? Minus Greer? I can never remember) on an extended Spring Break, here is a potentially useful tidbit of information for the freshmen (and newbies...I'm looking at you, Class of 2012): claiming that you made your bracket selections based on your "past NCAA tournament experience" gives you total street cred (if you have a dorky job, like me). Acceptably dorky people/positions include, but are not limited to:

- graduate students (any field, but statistics is probably the perfect one)
- researchers (hard science, soft science, post-docs, lackeys)
- health professionals (physicians, nurses, MAs, health educators)
- computer people (programmers, IT)
- engineers
- people in the financial sector who are forbidden to interact with clients (awkward social interactions)

Why is this gem a winner? Because, short of being this guy, everyone will correctly assume that your "tournament experience" was as a member of a band, dance team, cheerleading squad, or as your school's mascot...but they'll respect you for it regardless! You could be as inept as Palo Alto's infamous tree at playing the bracket numbers, but you can stroke your bruised ego with a passing mention of tourneys gone by. A sample interaction (based closely on an actual conversation):

Dr. Stat: "Lisa...nice picks!"
Me: "Thanks, Dr. Stat!"
D.S. "What's your secret? I went down in flames the other day!"
Me: "Well, being a member of my college band, I had the opportunity to go to three NCAA tournaments, so I saw a lot of unbelievable things unfold right in front of me. Last year in Lexington, we caught the end of the Stanford/UW-Milwaukee game before ours, and Stanford ended up losing, despite the 7'0" twins! I think they're highly overrated, so I picked them to lose. It turns out they didn't, but I knew ("based on my tournament experience" heavily implied) they very well could."
D.S. "Well, I hope you win!" (fabrication)

Of course, if you make many correct predictions, they might assume you've figured out a way to beat the house!

Take-home message from these ramblings: play up your first-hand involvement in college athletics! It doesn't matter if you're intentionally vague about your actual participation because, well, people will put two and two together. And you will be perceived as too cool for school among your fellow nerds.

Thank You Seniors!

as read on Saturday, March 9th at the Palestra ("Senior Night")

At this time, we would like to recognize the graduating members of the Penn Band for their dedication and loyalty to Penn Athletics. Not only do they show up at every men's and women's home game, but they travel to virtually all of the away games as well. And they are more than just the band; they are fans, too. In a hostile Ivy gym, they are often the loudest and most vocal show of support.

In supporting Penn and Penn Athletics, some of these students have logged more miles than some Heads of State - bus trips all over the North East to all of the Ivies, plus trips to such venues as Cleveland OH, Dallas TX, and Lexington KY to cheer on the men's Ivy Championship basketball teams in the NCAA tournaments.

For the many hours on buses, for all the nights in sleeping bags in some foreign lounge, and for all their time and dedication, we salute your following Penn Band Senior Starters:

On flute,

an Ancient History major,

with a minor in French,

secretary of the band’s honor society,

from Rahway NJ,

Megan Brindle.

On trombone,

a dual degree candidate with majors in American History and Political Science,

past low brass section leader and current president of the band honor society,

from Harrisville PA,

Melanie Foreman.

On flute,

a Cognitive Science major,

With minors in French and Psychology,

from Medford NJ,

Shannon Fouse.

On clarinet,

a dual degree candidate with majors in Chemistry and Nanoscale Material Science Engineering,

with minors in Creative Writing and Mathematics,

past president and current drum major,

from Rockville MD,

Rebecca Goldman.

On snare drum,

a dual degree candidate with majors in Management and Bioengineering,

with a minor in Mathematics,

from Ellicottt City MD,

Barry Huang.

On saxophone,

a Chemical and Biomolecular Engineering major,

with a minor in Music,

past saxophone section leader,

from Buffalo NY,

Janelle Johnson.

On clarinet,

an English major

With a minor in Cinema Studies,

past equipment manager,

from Aldan PA,

Annabelle Lyons.

On clarinet,

a dual degree candidate with majors in International Relations and European History,

With a minor in Hispanic Studies,

chair of the band’s CD committee,

from Newbury MA,

Sofie Owen.

On saxophone,

a Biological Basis of Behavior major,

from Staten Island NY,

past chair of the band’s honor society,

Brooke Prashker.

On flute,

an Architecture Design major,

With a minor in Economics,

from Oceanside NY,

Raimy Schutzman.

On bass drum,

a dual degree candidate with majors in World History, Finance, and Accounting

with a minor in French,

past percussion section leader,

from Pleasanton CA,

Sunaina Seelam.

On bass drum,

a Science Technology and Society major

with a concentration in Business and Information Technology

past percussion section leader,

from Potomac MD,

Elaine Simeon.

On snare drum,

a Bioengineering major

with minors in Economics and Mathematics,

from Millburn NJ,

Sagar Singh.

On bass drum,

a dual degree candidate with majors in Finance and Management,

past percussion section leader,

from Tualatin OR,

Connie Wong.

Let’s hear it for your Penn Band seniors!

EOTY Awards

Yet another insight into the querkiness of the Penn Band. At the end of the year (EOTY) we have a gathering to give out awards. Most are sarcastic and funny. I got a great award this year (Most Valuable Bando!), and my section - along with the chops - got a great award, too. (There are army men hidden all over 322 S. 42nd.) Good times were had by all. Thanks to the old board for all you time. You weren't appreciated enough, and I am sure the next one will not be either.

*Fanfare End of the Year Awards, 2007*

The 43rd Annual John Baker Tossed Cookies Award- Lauren the horn player for redecorating the living room at 233.

The 40th Melons Award – Ellen Williams.

The 110th Annual Dealing with "stuff" Award – Annabelle Lyons.

The 12th Annual Ilena Olster Award- Rachel Mathisen for her outstanding contributions to the Bitchiness of the band.

The BFL Rookie of the Year Award- Stephen Abrams dash Downey. For his fearless physical assault in the name of football.

The 4th Annual Jevelyn Award- Skeast Girl (Cindy and Andrea) for their inability to be separated for even one song.

The Third Reich United Nations Award- Vicky "Colossus" Parysek. Because you're not really Polish.

The best-kept, shiniest, nicest instrument award- Mike Jarell.

The 11th Annual Clarissa Fesler Verbosity Award- Gordon Watkins, because none of us can get a word in edgewise.

The 17th Annual Susan Ross Memorial Award- Robert DeSocio
for his tireless commitment to the scanner.

The 3rd Annual "You know it's cold if he's wearing pants" Award- Tom Hensle.

The "You Graduated Morons" Creepy Old Guy Award – Jeanne and Erica.

The 1st annual "Penniless Sitar Player" Award- Jaci Rifkin.

The Most Valuable Bando Award- Mel Foreman, for everything she's done.

The 109plus-or-minus-one-th Annual Zookeeper Award- Becca Goldman for not killing us all.

4th Annual Mayuko Endo Stream of Consciousness Award: Joe Catania.

The 1st annual Dundee for Whitest Sneakers: Alex Kenney.

1st Annual bring your friends award: Ray Fung, for causing the percussion section to run out of instruments.

4th Annual "Evil Bob Kennedy" Award: Alvin Cheng, for always being so mean.

12th Annual Honorary Bando Award: Jose the bus driver.

The 11th Annual Joe Bando Award- Kyle Pickett for most embodying the characteristics of one's everyday Joe.

6th Annual Worst Excuse for missing band award: Jen Johnson, Dan Ross, Raimy Schutzman, and Sasha Renninger for just being too damn lazy to make it to rehearsals.

25th Annual Captain Francis "Gary" Powers Spy Award: The Brass sections for infiltrating Cornell territory and making it out alive.

3rd Annual too much information award: Zach Klitzman, for letting us all know about his random boners.

Most Likely to Have His or Her Name Mispronounced: Devanshi Jalan.

The 2^nd Annual Product of Bandcest Award: Katie Palusci, For her inevitable contribution to the propagation of the Bando species.